To list or not to list!

Lists, are you a lover or a hater? Are you a fully paid up member of the bullet point journal sisterhood with meticulously planned pages covering every aspect of your daily life, or are you at best a scribble on the back of an old envelope type of lister.

Do you start every day with a list of things to do; celebrating those days (do they ever happen?) when you can fall into bed having ticked every box or berating yourself roundly on those days when you seem to have more unchecked boxes left than you started with.

Are you one of those highly organised shoppers who has a list, takes it with them to the shop (rather than leaving it on the kitchen table) and actually buys everything on the list, and nothing extra? if you are kudos! I rarely write a list, if I do I even more rarely remember to take it with me, and if I've accomplished all of the above then the likelihood of my buying everything on the list and not buying a dozen unlisted items as well is virtually nill!

I've downloaded these sort of lists, bought the wire bound notebooks of these lists, designed my own beautiful lists, I've even filled them out, colour coding responses, laboriously drawing little boxes for my ticks, which never come!

I've even tried planning my day's to do lists using my iPad, my phone, my computer, with trusty note book beside it. the end result is the same, failure, abject frustrating failure.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not advocating launching into each day without any plans, without any idea about what you need/hope to achieve. I'm not saying don't make lists, indeed at my age the senior moments are leading me more and more to the need for lists, especially for doing things for others, remembering appointments. I've realised however, that my list making skills are more developed in the recording of events, achievements, and answers to prayer.

This is more my sort of journal, this comes from a list of the most unusual lists, I'm really not sure what the motivation is but I love the battered every day use appearance. It reminds me of Sarah Anderson's beautiful journal which is filled with incredible art work and recordings of special days and events.

There is no doubt that there is a place for list making, just look at the Bible with its lists of genealogies, laws, offerings and duties. There are definitely things which we need to remember, people, events, feelings, relationships.  My favourite lists are the ones we often see on Facebook, the attitude of gratitude sort of list, recording something, no matter how small or insignificant that has blessed us. I love looking back over prayer lists particularly noticing those prayer requests that have been answered.

So, I will continue to be a fully paid up member of the society of listers! My listing may be mainly retrospective and I may never become adept at writing lists as a way of organising myself but, I will take delight in revisiting my lists of blessings, memorable days with family and friends, memorable places I have visited, answers to prayer and words of encouragement.

I wonder, if you share lists online, are you a "BLister"?
    

Tradition

Tradition; this word always reminds me of that wonderful song from Fiddler on the Roof. Poor Tevye railing against the abandonment of tradition, clinging on to the old customs, battling new ideas, new ways of thinking, new ways of behaving. 

The picture of the wax crayons reminds me of a family tradition, a cardboard carton of new Crayola crayons (only 12 when I was little) coupled with a new colouring book and a magic paint book in our Christmas stockings. (I'm not quite old enough for the piece of coal and the satsuma!) the joy of opening the new box, smelling them, colouring carefully until they became blunt and we had to tear the paper to continue using them. They were the first crayons we used at school, pristine and pretty for the first few days but then gradually broken, tattered and much less appealing.

Painting  time, big chunky brushes, pots of bright red, yellow and blue paint, but only if you got to have the first turn! If your go was later on in the session you were left with three pots of indeterminate mucky brown colours. These were and I trust still are traditional rites of passage in reception classes up and down the country.

The glorious, traditional fountain pen (still my favourite writing implement) Another rite of passage in the final year of junior school, putting the pencil to one side and graduating to the school dip pen and browny red coloured ink. (Remind me to tell you a story about my deferred transition to writing in ink!) Blots and drips, scratchy nibs and the joy of blotting paper before finally receiving your first proper fountain pen, with cartridges if you were really posh! I think I had a new fountain pen every Christmas from the age of eleven till I left home to go to college.

The war horse which was the type writer; I remember passing by the Commercial Class (as it was called) and being stunned by the noise of the dozens of fingers stabbing away at the keys. I didn't do typing at school (or domestic science, but that's another story!) but I was allowed to use a typewriter at home, with a grandfather, father and mother who had been or were journalists there were several in the house. 

Our technology was very definitely not high tech, but very low techy techy! We couldn't print off several (hundred!) copies in an instant, though you could do two or three with sheets of copy paper which was blue, very flimsy and very mucky to handle.

Even with all the limitations there were some advantages. Advantages that I miss, once you'd written your pages be it on lined paper with a fountain pen or plain paper on a typewriter you couldn't lose the whole lot by an accidental slip of your pinkie brushing a seemingly innocent key. Transforming your hours of work into a blank screen leaving you broken and traumatised. (I'm speaking form personal experience)

I am I must confess a bit of a traditionalist when it comes to writing, a bit of a dinosaur. I accept the need for technological development and the advantages of laptops, tablets, iPads and the like. I even enjoy some of the benefits and the clever gadgets and gizmos that can improve the look of my writing but at heart I'm a cursive, pen on paper scribe.

When Ben and  I were visiting schools with our creative writing workshops I always told the children that they should take a pencil, biro and paper with them when they had to go to appointments or on car journeys, then, should the unimaginable happen, no wifi, a flat battery and no charger they would still have the means to entertain themselves  and keep themselves busy and amused; even if they only played noughts and crosses!

We cannot deny that we live in a rapidly changing world. Technology moves on and upgrades on a seemingly daily basis. We can't bury our heads in the sand, but neither should we throw the baby out with the bath water.  Churches too must balance the traditional with the fast changing way of 21st century life. As Christians we have to find a way to be still, to be quiet in the midst of perpetual electronic stimulation and constant availability.

There is a place for the trusty pen and paper, to be unplugged from all the demands and intrusions of modern technology, to give ourselves time to think.

What about a traditional family Sunday  from time to time,. listen to some music, sing round the piano, play board games, , paper and pencil games. We must move with the times, but like Tevye we must be ready to defend and fight for those traditions worth keeping.

Travelling through.

How many of you are enthusiastic travellers? Do you love the swell of the waves, the surge of the aircraft defying gravity as it leaves the ground, the regular purr of a well tuned  engine as you speed along a motorway (traffic permitting!) Me, not so much, I love holidays, I love visiting other countries and new places but as someone who has been travel sick since I was two weeks old the actual journeys involved are at best something to be endured before my holiday can begin, and at worst nightmares.

Are you a planner? Do you gather together forest loads of holiday brochures, spend hours on the internet,  choose next years holiday from your sun lounger? Do you pour over maps planning routes, seeking out places to visit. Or, are you a pin in a map type of adventurer, a seeker of the dangerous and the different, or a same time, same place returner to old haunts?

How do you react if what you booked and planned doesn't turn out to be exactly as described in the brochure. Are you an exploder, full of fury and bluster or a take it in your stride, laid back sort. Would your reaction be one of anger and disappointment, spoiling the whole holiday; or would it be to see the funny side and make the best of things, storing it all up to amuse your family and friends when you get home.

Are you a go it alone, self sufficient traveller, happiest on your own, unafraid to step out into the unknown, confident in your own preparations and abilities. Are you ready to up sticks at the drop of a hat unencumbered by material possessions and things.

Or, do you like to have everything planned, all possibilities covered, timings written in stone, your agenda fixed, no room for spontaneity or sudden impulses.

Do you ever take the time to stop and enjoy the view, a beautiful sunset...

... a rainbow, a hedgerow of flowers, an ancient ruin, horses in a field, a toddler enjoying a first walk on a sandy beach. Or do you have to fill every minute with activity and busyness? Have I lost you on my meander?  I wonder if our approach to holidays mirrors our approach to life? We are all merely travelling through, our life is a journey. sometimes it is beautifully smooth, straight paths no surprises, but then

all of a sudden our lovely straight paths and all our carefully worked out plans are thrown into disarray. Life takes over, obstacles, challenges, difficulties, choices. That's when we need to remember just who travels every step of the way with us. Our Heavenly Sat Nav isn't thrown by anything, all our days are numbered, He has a plan and a purpose for every moment of our lives, as long as we listen to Him, wait on Him and then follow His directions we will be back on track, it may not be what we planned or expected but it will be ok.

Enjoy the journey, take the best you can from every situation; we are blessed because no matter where life leads us we know our ultimate destination.   

 

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If you've got it flaunt it!

I wonder if any one knows what this is? I don't know the botanical name but it is, incredibly a flower, an orchid. Wow!

Again, wow! That is some fish! These amazing creatures certainly aren't shy and they definitely aren't trying to hide away. They are showing their true colours to the world in all their vibrant, eye popping glory!

I imagine we have all seen a peacock strutting and calling out to all, they are the very epitome of pride, flaunting their finery and demanding attention from all around them.

When it comes to people we are not all quite as comfortable with "strutting our stuff " as the rest of nature. I for one would never, ever, wear some thing close fitting or highly patterned.  I am rather awed by larger than life (in every sense!) people who wear (or indeed barely wear!) clothing which draws attention to themselves. 

Children however often love to dress up, to wear costumes or brightly coloured clothes, hats, jazzy socks and tee shirts. As a rule, children love people to comment on their clothes, they accept compliments with abundant grace and delight, a trait which we seem to lose as we age.

When my Mum saw people outrageously attired, or with wildly creative hair styles she would always say, "Well, if you've got it flaunt it!" Now, I am not and never have been pretty and I've never been comfortable being highly visible, I certainly would rather walk round with a bag on my head than strut my stuff and flaunt it. But I do have something that I should really be happy to reveal to the world. I have something that I should never be ashamed to flaunt or make apparent to the world. I have a relationship with Jesus Christ, the Light of the World, He knows me, me! by name and He loves me, and He died for me and He intercedes for me and prays for me. I have an unbeatable team on my side, Father, Son and Holy Spirit who are there with me in every situation and at all times. My demeanour, my attitude, my words and my actions should shine out, an inner glow if you like, which attracts notice, comment or questions. I've got it and I must be willing to flaunt it, have you, and will you?  

Beware the vibes of "but"...

It may appear to be an insignificant, unimportant little word, but...I wonder if you can guess where I'm going with this?

This little word has the power to crush, destroy, wound, hurt and generally cause untold misery. I grew up in a loving, caring home, but...I often felt that what ever I did simply wasn't good enough, any praise was automatically followed with a but...

Decades later I could see the loving reasons behind the negativity; the desire to encourage me to work harder, do better, to strive, but...it didn't work, my personality didn't rise to the encouragement, it conceded defeat so my response was to not try, to not work, to tick by and do the minimum, I passed eight GCSEs, three A levels and a degree in teaching, even an advanced diploma in teaching children with special educational needs, but I passed, I didn't do as well as I might have done if I'd put in even a little serious effort. My irrational thinking was that if I didn't pass because I hadn't worked I hadn't failed.  

But doesn't have to be about the big things to hurt, the little "buts" mount up, the times when a little child washes up, makes their bed, puts make up on, tidies their bedroom and receives a thank you, a well done followed by a but if you'd done it this way or that way it would have been better.

It seems to be almost a default setting, as a parent our instant response can so often be well done, but...it's not intentional, it's not meant to be critical or confrontational, it's meant to help encourage our children to do better.

This can be detrimental to a small child but how will it affect a teenager, confrontation is almost their reason for living, challenging, pulling away, finding their own way. A judgemental sounding "but" is going to have the same effect as lighting the blue touch paper on a firework!

It is not easy, it is something that  slips off the tongue without thought, our only intention that of helping and encouraging, we may not even notice the physical clues that we have hurt our child.

This made me think about Father God, Abba, when we whisper our first hesitant, rambling prayers He doesn't respond with well done but.. next time do it this way. He doesn'tlook at our journaling pages and ruffle our hair and say well done, but.. next time make your writing clearer. Our Heavenly Father sees the heart attitude, He sees the desire to spend time with Him, to grow to be more like His Son, Jesus, our Saviour, to draw closer and closer to Him, to serve Him, love Him and please Him.

When we do anything for God, rooted in love and a desire to serve, please and bring glory to His Name, even when we get it wrong and fail I'm sure that His response is well done, don't worry, it didn't go the way you hoped but... I love that you tried, you did your best, try again, let's do it together.

This is a message for me, I know how often I respond to Ben with a  that's great, but... I'm going to count to three (hundred, thousand!) before I answer or comment, I'm not going to leap in with a but; maybe when needed a gentler, that's great, it's hard isn't it, shall I show you how I  do that?  Even better, maybe a that's great, show me how you did that!

Be you!

Next Sunday it will be our first Creative Café Church after the summer break. We are going to be  basing  our worship on Psalm 139 (not for the first time) Café Church is a group of adults with a variety of additional, special needs and their families. It is always a time of blessings, joy and fun and the worship is sometimes chaotic but always fervent! Two of our members  will be excitedly showing us the medals they have won at the Special Olympics in Sheffield last month, and we will be celebrating their successes and the many things that make each of our special friends uniquely special.

Ben is part of this lovely faith family and he like all of his friends, has attributes that are at once endearing and infuriating! They all have a wonderful sense of self, they have unashamed pride in the things they do, and an equally  unashamed pride in the achievements of their friends. Unlike many (most?) of us, when they are praised or told they are good at something they don't simper, they don't say no I'm not really very good, they say, yes I am, I'm brilliant!

I used to be a little embarrassed when Ben responded to praise or compliments in this way, I'd tell him off for sounding cocky, but then I realised that he was simply living out Psalm 139, he knows who he is in God, he absolutely confident in his relationship with God. He fully embraces  the words "fearfully and wonderfully made" and celebrates being the person God made him to be.

Ben is an overachiever in some ways, his reading and writing skills and his language skills are far ahead of his comprehension and understanding in terms of worldly situations and events, he actually often understands very little of what is said to him or what he reads and so completely misses the point or what has actually been stated. He is not independent in terms of self care and daily living and can easily be upset, stressed, confused or frightened when he doesn't understand what is going on around him.

But... Ben has been doing the read the Bible in one year challenge and he is still up to date! He reads it every morning without fail. he does his Word for Today daily devotion and he has a prayer journal which he writes in as well as speaking out his prayers.

He you tubes his favourite praise and worship songs and sings along or plays along on his ukelele and he googles verses he wants to use for his blog or in his (not very) quiet time.

I always do a craft with Café Church, linked to our theme and sometimes I do it with a calendar and an activity that can be ticked off between then and the next months meeting. Ben sticks to this unwaveringly, in July I everyone a world map and a sheet with all the dates till we meet next Sunday.

Not only has Ben managed to keep up with this, not missing a day but he's shown me that he googles world news every morning and chooses what he thinks needs to go on his prayer list!

In worldy measures Ben falls short, he's not perfect (who is) he and his friends can be ridiculed, teased, pitied, abused, rejected and regarded as "less than". But they are made in God's image, God has a plan and a purpose for them, God sees them as perfect, He doesn't make mistakes. In a somewhat convoluted  and meandering way what I am saying is be a Ben, remember who you are in God, don't undervalue the skills, talents and abilities God has given you. We won't all be  brilliant musicians, artists, leaders or superstars but we all do have a place in God's Kingdom, we all do have a purpose which is from our Heavenly Father. We are all precious in His sight, in Brucie's words, we are all His favourite.


 

Don't look in the cupboards!

My surface tablet decided to take this photo of my messy desk all by itself! (Well, my wayward finger might have had something to do with it!) but it is in keeping with my thoughts for the day, in a messy roundabout sort of way.

I don't know about you, but when people visit my home it usually means there has been a frantic flurry of tidying activity on my part, papers, books, crayons, gelli plates (?) etc gathered up and thrown into cupboards and drawers, notice the emphasis on crafting bits and bobs! Throw into the mix a hasty stint at the sink washing up and a gathering up of clothes for washing from Ben's bedroom. You get the picture.

The visitors arrive and say how welcoming and lovely your home is and you can't help yourself, you blurt out, "Thank you, but don't open the cupboards, anything might fall out!"
Now at this juncture I must just say that since our well documented move to our new home six months ago this frantic tidy up is not nearly so frantic, chaotic, or even necessary! all that decluttering really has made a difference to our home and our lives.

The washing is gently placed in the dishwasher, the cushions on the sofa plumped up and we're pretty much good to go. Crafting and  journaling stuff can stay out if that was what we were doing prior to the visit and we're even totally happy to receive unexpected visitors without being wracked with shame at the state of our home. it feels good.

This got me thinking, last night when I should have been sleeping! This tendency to shove the clutter away in a cupboard, shutting the door firmly and hoping no one opens it, letting it all spill out is  I fear what some of us (me definitely) at some time do with our emotions and our faith. We show the world our hastily tidied, external appearance, smiling, saying all the right things when behind the closed doors of our hearts the clutter of pain, fear, doubt, anger, bitterness, resentment is straining to be released.

Now, I am not for one minute suggesting we all go around broadcasting every detail of our inward struggles and battles (visitors please don't worry, I won't unleash the cupboards) but, there is a time and a place when a spiritual and or emotional declutter is necessary even essential. A time when we make the decision to face up to those things that we prefer to keep buried. Sharing with a trusted friend(s) who can help you bring it to the Lord is perfect but there will be some for whom the wounds from the past are so deep they need the help  of a professional counsellor or even doctor. Prayer is obviously our greatest weapon and tool for healing, recovery and hope for  the future, we are blessed that we can ask for prayer without even needing to go into specifics , we have the Holy Spirit to guide our hearts and words to respond, and we have Jesus Christ Himself as our intercessor.

I can honestly say that the effects of decluttering practically and spiritually and emotionally are freeing, uplifting, and liberating. It costs; it hurts, it challenges and it drags us out of our comfort zones and our protective shells but it is worth it. 2 Timothy 1:7 says "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline."

So, the next time you have visitors, throw open the doors of your cupboards (just provide protective helmets if there are any sharp or heavy objects that might fall!)   

Jolly hockey sticks!

This is posh me! Rarely spotted in public, timid and prone to flight when challenged! I'm not naturally a smart, sophisticated sort of female (much to my Mum's disappointment!), dressing up to go out is the opposite of a treat for me, I just feel out of sorts, uncomfortable and not me. I'm at my happiest in jogging bottoms or jeans and a tee-shirt! However, when looked at in relation to my life that is not altogether inappropriate.

Ben was scrolling through posts from the 2016 Olympics when he  came across pictures of the women's hockey team, we both remembered our increasing pride and excitement as our hugely talented ladies progressed through the tournament, we watched every match avidly and  I have to confess we both danced and cheered around our living room when they won the gold medal.

As a school girl (more decades ago than I choose to share) hockey was my sport, I loved it, I played for school and was hockey captain and I played for a local ladies team and a mixed hockey team, our school team even won the Cheshire Cup for the first time in sixty years while I was captain and my college team won the British Colleges tournament while I was there and playing. I was passionate about my sport and practised pretty much every day outside my house. 

When I was sixteen my P.E teacher. applied for me to go on a long weekend advanced hockey coaching camp at I.M. Marsh P.E. College in Liverpool.  I was simultaneously excited, thrilled and more than a little bit terrified. Firstly I travelled on my own (first time ever) then when I finally made my way down the hugely intimidating drive to the imposing main building and found my way to the registration point I discovered that I was the youngest on the course (by three years) as all the others were students at college, university or teaching in schools. Panic alert! I think nowadays what ensued would be described as a meltdown! I took myself off to the toilets and broke my heart.

Once I was able to breathe  without risk of imminent collapse I made my way to the lifts to find my room in the halls of residence. I did not ( and do not ) like lifts but my room was, if I remember correctly on the sixth floor, they were no ordinary lifts, they were door less and moved continuously, you had to leap in and out at the appropriate time unless you wanted to go up and down for eternity (always assuming you got in in the first place) The first night was not easy, pretty much everyone knew everyone, except me. I spent the evening sitting in proximity to but apart from the fun.

I strongly suspect that if mobile phones had been around then my Mum would have received multiple texts requesting (no, begging) that she got my Dad to come and take me home. Sadly, or happily, no such method of communication was available in those days. I was stuck there till Monday!

I have to confess that the weekend got better, once we got into the drills, passing, tackling and  shooting practices everything fell into place. I became part of the group, made friends, had the time of my life, loved every minute and didn't want to go home on Monday. We even had a seven aside tournament on the Sunday afternoon on the hottest day for a decade, and my team won!

Sometimes God sends us into situations that are at best daunting and at worst terrifying, He gently pushes us out of our comfort zones ( doesn't feel gentle I know) and into the place where all we can do is keep pressing on, step by timid step trusting He is there guiding, upholding, equipping and cheering. If we hold our nerve and stick it out it can turn out to be just what we needed, and a great experience.

if your're going to be a tree, be a palm tree!

Palm trees! They just conjure up images of gloriously balmy, sunny, sandy beaches and crystal clear blue seas. An extra comfortable beach lounger, a cool drink and of course, a good book. Oooh, beam me up Scotty!

Palm trees are for many of us part of happy memories of family holidays, things of some beauty and beneficial shade; but, there's a lot more to the palm tree than immediately hits the eye. Palm trees as a rule grow in sandy, rocky places, with lots of sun and not too much rain. they have to dig deep for the nutrients they require to grow.

Fact 1  you can chop into a palm tree and it won't die, unlike most trees where their nutrients are stored just below the surface of the bark, the nutrients of the palm tree are stored deep within.  

Fact 2  the root system below a palm tree is always considerably higher (taller) than the actual tree you can see.  Its roots stretch down to the depths to find the water and all they need to sustain life.

Fact 3  when a tropical storm hits, the palm tree can bend to the ground from one side to the other time after time but it will not break. In fact a palm tree is stronger after a storm has passed over!

The palm tree is deceptively strong, it is resilient, it cannot be broken by the rigours of daily living. It digs deep in order to feed and nourish itself and sustain itself when life gets rough.

As Christians we should be like the palm tree, we should root and establish ourselves in the presence of God, in His Word  in prayer and fellowship with Him and with  our brothers and sisters in the faith. Our root system should be bigger than our visible selves and that strength will protect us and sustain us against attack and the world when the storms hit. We may be bent, wounded, beaten down but we can and will bounce back and stand tall again.

In Ephesians 3:17 -18 Paul prays "I pray that out of the riches of His glory, He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to comprehend the length and width and height and depth of His love." 

I can't think of anything better than being rooted and grounded in the love of God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit!